I'm Not (unreleased)

by Laura Imbruglia



This song is SO EMBARRASSING. I used to play it circa 2001-2002. I recorded it but never released it because it's stupid.
And I'm bisexual, so it's factually incorrect.

I have set a price of $5 per download on it because I don't think it should be easy to acquire. The harder I make it for people to download and own, the better I will feel as a human.

But hey, it's entertaining in its cringiness. Here, have a giggle.



What opinion would you form on me if I told you my favourite TV star was Ellen DeGeneres and my favourite rock star’s Freddie Mercury?
Or if you found out I rarely wear a skirt, I don’t like make-up, there’s a rainbow logo on my favourite t-shirt?
Well I know what you’re thinking now….but I’m not. I’m not. I’m not!

Damn, I hate stereotypes! Last year all guys were calling me "mate", I don’t know quite why, I thought maybe it was because my hair was short & spiked.
So I grew it an inch or two, and they’re not calling me "mate" anymore, but they’re calling me "dude". Noooooo!

Oh why does everyone think I’m gay?
It wouldn’t be a problem if I was, but I’m not.
Finding a guy is all work and no play when you’re a straight girl but the male population thinks you’re gay.

It’s been a long time since I’ve had any close contact with a guy other than him patting me on the back as he said “hey there buddy!”
I may not cross my legs when I wear pants, but it gives me a lesser chance of developing varicose veins when I’m old (I’ve been told).

To all the girls – please don’t come onto me when I’m out,
I’m paranoid, it freaks me out!
All the guys will turn away and these 4 words I’ll hear them say – “I told you so”.
No I’m not in homosexual denial, I’m just not!
I’m not! I’m not! I’m not!

GO GAY RIGHTS! (Of course I’m straight)
ANNE HECHE BITES (but Ellen’s great)
Yeah he’s a liar and so vain, but now I’m feeling Ian Thorpe's pain.

It's bad when everyone thinks you're gay
But I'd be picking up a hell of a lot more if I was
I just won't take it, no it's not ok
to be a straight girl if the male population thinks I'm gay

I’m a straight girl but the whole population thinks I’m gay
…even my parents.


released May 5, 2005
Copyright Laura Imbruglia 2005


all rights reserved



Laura Imbruglia Melbourne, Australia

Australian songwriter Laura Imbruglia has been releasing records since the early noughties, covering a range of genres from folk to throat-tearing punk, dark country, psychedelic rock and everything in between.

Laura’s fourth album “Scared Of You” (produced by Nick Huggins) was released 29 March 2019.
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